ETHICS

A young attorney went into the Judge's chambers and looking furtively around, pulled out a wad of cash.

"Here's R10,000," he said. "I really need to win this motion!"

The judge looked appalled, "What kind of a judge do you think I am?" he asked, angrily, his face red.

The young attorney sputtered, embarrassed, "Your Lordship, I ... I heard you could be bought!" he said.

The judge calmed down a little bit.

"Son," he said, "were I to take your money, I'd be committing a gross ethical transgression!"

"I see," said the young attorney. "I guess taking a bribe is pretty unethical."

The judge looked puzzled for a moment.

"I don't think you understand. Your opponent has already paid me handsomely. Were I to take your money, it would be a conflict of interest!"

* * * * * *

A young attorney went into the Judge's chambers and placed an envelope before the Judge.

"Your Lordship, there's R6,000 cash in that envelope," he said. "I really need to win this motion!"

The judge smiled, winked at the young attorney and took the envelope.

Once the judge entered the court, he called the two opposing parties before him, "This young man tried to bribe me by paying me R6,000!" he said, returning the young attorney's envelope to him.

The young attorney sputtered, embarrassed, "Your Lordship, I ... I heard you could be bought!" he said.

"Apparently so did your opponent!" said the judge "He paid me R5,000 yesterday. So now son, if you open that envelope you will find only R1,000 in cash, thus placing you both on equal footing before me, with no conflict of interest."